How to Find a True Healer or Spiritual Mentor in an E-Commerce-Crazed Culture?
The 4 Secret Doorways To Healing and Self-Realization

by Ronda LaRue

Ronda LaRue

The answer you find after considering this article may surprise you...

A mature healer or spiritual guide is very important for each of us at certain key times along the path of living and growing in our true purpose, passion and power. There are times in the journey of living where life inevitably takes us through difficult passages into a dark night of soul; times of seemingly insurmountable sufferings, confusion, betrayal, and utter personal hopelessness. The death of a loved one, change of heart of a spouse, a "terminal disease", a dreadful injury, confusion and crisis, deep spiritual longing, These are the most miserable and dangerous times of our lives. And they are also the call to a fundamental insight of Self that makes the human spirit come alive in its beauty of our sacred purpose and artistry of wholeness....if we're graced in our searching...

Seeking spiritual assistance at times in our lives of great hurt, confusion, or "dead-end" paralysis, is an important first key to healing and deepening insight. The act of asking, itself makes a powerful and implicit statement of commitment and courage to the universe and to your inner waiting Self! "Ask and it shall be given". Asking is an invocation of intention and it hastens to you the mysterious journey we each are called to make: The journey of living our life according to its fullest truth.

How do we find a true spiritual healer, mentor or guide in this e-commerce-crazed culture? With thousands of new web sites entering the world wide web every day, and no watch dog (Ha! I accidentally just typed "with no watch-god") to monitor the claims or practices of what anyone can start as a business and hang out as their virtual shingle, how are you to know who is substantial and who merely a good claims-marketer? This is true of any service or product purchased over the Net today, but the concern becomes more personally critical when one is suffering and seeking true spiritual guidance and good reliable healing resources.

With the many thousands of people proclaiming themselves spiritual healers, life coaches, and mentors, and the confusing array of modalities, claims and promises, it can quickly seem both overwhelmingly confusing and disempowering. It can quickly feel impossible to separate who and what is real from those offering cleverly pumped-up marketing hype with insubstantial promises. I know I've felt this way, and particularly when I've been in moments of real health crisis or in serious need of real solutions to restore balance and wellbeing.

It's great that we have the Net! And I love being able to search anything my mind can dream up - and in seconds - have answers right in my own home. I also think it's a really great sign of our times that so many people are feeling called to step forward with their deep spiritual gifts and genuine interests in serving and helping others by creating a marketable presence over a global community on the Internet. Today we have at our finger tips literally the world of spiritual traditions and therapies, both old and emerging technologies, from a truly global community! You can find and contact a South African Shaman, an orthomolecular nutritionist in Canada, a Tibetan priest, or a top depression and addiction counselor in L.A. in seconds.

Still, I don't know about you, but when I go to search today I am blown away by the sheer numbers of people, and the overwhelming modalities presented on the simple stroke of my keyword search! Eeee gads!

At times of high personal stress we're all naturally more needy and more wanting of a quick easy solution. At these times we're more vulnerable to seductive promises, big claims, enticing fix alls. And at these times more than any other, what we most need are true and good people with deep integrity who don't over promise what can be delivered on our journey to our healing, wholeness and restored wellbeing.

Last week as I was spending my early morning hours looking at and responding to emails sent to me from people inquiring about the spiritual realization work I offer in my private soul-arts retreat, I received a second email from a woman who was considering coming to a customized private retreat. In this follow up email she pretty stunningly blasted forth all of the fears and confusions she and all of us have had when we need something deeply but don't fully know or trust the thing we're considering (in her case it was a private soul-arts retreat in hopes of breaking through a lifetime of stated self-sabotage, betrayal, and despair at not living up to her life's true potential). She was in crisis and she was vulnerable, and she just spewed it all out there in her anguish, fear and mistrust. It was quite a blast.

Her email caused me to reflect on this very question in some depth, and I think I came up with some useful pointers or "secret doorways" when seeking true spiritual help over the Internet, or anywhere else for that matter.

Many people would probably read her aggressive email and say "Oh boy, a crazy! I'll just let this one race right on by". In truth I was tempted to do the same. But something in her raw honesty caught my heart and I could see, appreciate (and FEEL) her inner angst and confusion. I've been there too! In that written expression of hurt, distrust and dismay I could feel her vulnerable courage to step out and still seek help. And at the same time, I could quickly imagine the challenge at facing some million pages of hopes, promises and miraculous claims - each selling their solution.

And so I began to ponder with her: "how do you find a real spiritual guide in times of life changing transition and spiritual or health crisis?"

I did a search myself. And as you can well guess, I found everything imaginable (and afore unimaginable for that matter!) from snake oil (no kidding) to the Dali Lama; from Robert Fuller to Reiki...and everything in between. Now here's the sensitive and intriguing part: We all have our viewpoints regarding what is "real" and what is "hocus pocus". And while there are clearly immature and irresponsible practitioners and products that play upon one's superstitious or desperate need, there are also realms of Spirit and healing that are outside of our current convention and linear mental constructs that do indeed have healing and restorative properties to offer. (See Part II: The Responsibility of Exchange for more on this topic.)

Practices that have been effectively powerful for thousands of years are not obliterated or out-dated by 300 years of post-modern thought. Interestingly in fact, modern science and its linear mechanistic model has dug itself into the ground and is breaking through to the other side; into a realization of a whole (nonlinear, non local) vast and intelligent universe that has been recognized by seers and theologians for millennia, as divine consciousness.

Before I became increasingly known as a spiritual author and teacher, I was a research scientist and analyst for 23 years. With a background and graduate degree in research methods, I more than many, fell into the category of "skeptic, you'll have to prove it to me". I was also a born mystic poet and artist. Something in this odd combination created in me a lifetime inquiry and search for "truth", "ultimate meaning", and the search for answers of "why we are here". As a result, I have looked into and studied more healing and self-realization modalities than I will take up space enumerating here.

My curiosity to understand what is genuinely real and what is ego and fear masquerading as real, has led me to study the science behind many spiritual claims (including research on vibrational medicine, the biology of belief, quantum physics, energy/matter and consciousness studies).

What I have found is that particular modalities of healing or pathways to enlightenment most always do have some aspect of true power and effect. And I also discovered something more astounding and to the point. While the plethora of healing modalities, therapies and products each have within them some property to positively impact healing, the real change agent is not the modality, the guide or practitioner.

The real healer is within you! The answer lies within...It is your own God-connected soul that knows what it needs and who can help open that way....if you learn to step into the divine mystery, listen, and trust your own inner wisdom! But how one might rightfully ask?

I suggest to you these progressive steps as you go about your search for a spiritual healer, guide or teacher. Simply become still and listen inside your own body (not your mind but your body) as you reflect upon these four secret doorways (as I have named them) and you will sense/know in your heart and soul what is right for you at this time... ("Be Still and Know...")


When you sense the need for spiritual assistance to help jump-start your life again, first and most essential of all, look and see where you are inside of yourself when you are searching for that life coach, healer or spiritual teacher. Try and find (even in the midst of confusion and crisis) that inner faith toward your own Soul's essential knowing. It feels like a kind of inclination beyond what your mind knows that you know.

Most often, people don't really "check in" to their motive in selecting someone to work with, and in not so doing, are often unconsciously seeking an outside rather than an inner answer. You see, if we are unaware that we are looking to buy an outside fix to our life's problems, then we may have to evolve through a process of spending lots of time and money on a plethora of products and services until we mature to a true inner readiness for self-responsible healing and empowered self-realization. This is often the trail one takes, seeking an outside fix and placing responsibility on the power of the practitioner.

Click to read the full article and learn about all the doorways to finding a true healer or spiritual mentor.

Copyright Ronda LaRue, 2011/12. All Rights Reserved

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